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Supermarine Spitfire….erm… sort of. It's a Spitfire Jim, but not as we know it.


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As the old saying goes “you can't have too much of a sodding awful thing", yes I'm sure that's how it goes. You wait ages for one and if you're unlucky, two turn up at the same time.

@Lost Cosmonauts has stolen my thunder (damn you island dwellers… yes I know Britland is an island but I was specifically referring to those damn west coast Scolandish, thunder-stealing, small-island dwellers). I thought 'no one else will think of this', well great minds think alike, and apparently ours do to. Who knows, by the end of this GB we might have a whole squadron of Starfix Spits and wouldn't that be a thing of wonder? :|

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As some unnamed small-island dwellers are MUCH too busy to show what you get for the money, I'll start by giving a proper review for all of those who are desperate to get their hands on this.

When you first open the box (end opening – damnit Starfix you can't even get that right) you will see a crime against humanity in kit form - in silvery plastic. It may be silver, but it still won't be possible to polish this turd. I have to say that the quality and detail is probably at the level of early 1/72 Airfix. This being supersized, the offence is effectively magnified. Well, sort of supersized as I've read that the scale is actually 1/56 rather than 1/48. I know it'll come as a shock that Starfix have fibbed about it being 1/48. Let me introduce you to the kit contents.

I always say “if it looks like a Spitfire then”….erm… probably best not go don't that line of reasoning. The tooling moulds for Starfix kits are chewed out of aged Parmesan by a trained rat called Colin. Parmesan is ideal for making moulds if your intention is to make really shite kits. Colin phoned in sick the day they made the Shitefire mould so they had to used the completely unskilled Kevin the gerbil. Kevin and Starfix were the perfect match and Colin got a job at Special Hobby.

Kevin never did find out what an aircraft is.

If your first impression is 'poor', it's time for me to tell you that these are probably the best parts in the kit. If you're thinking 'lovely, show me more', I'm taking you off my Christmas card list.

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I particularly like the way they have used their imagination with those rivets on the wings. Alistair wondered why the spinner comes to a point. It's obvious really, there has to be some point to this kit.

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Look at all that lovely detail! This kit is going to take me weeks… until I can bring myself to look in the box again.

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Good effort effort with the pilot, I've seen worse. Not to say that this is good, it just means that Lindbreg figures are an even bigger pile of crap in comparison. Having said that, I'm not sure what he should be piloting. Certainly not anything WWII or 1/48. He looks more 'modern' to me. I mean, look at those flared trousers for a start.

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I'm no historian, I doubt infants were allowed in the drivers seat. Perhaps this was 'Bring your Child to work day' to see how they managed with those pesky 190's. Compared to a Tamiya 1/48 Spit jockey:

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There will now be a brief interlude to give us the strength to carry on.

 

To save the pilot embarrassment, the canopy is frosted so that he can't see those tiresome 109 pilots laughing at him. At first I thought the canopy was missing only to find that it had been lovingly chucked in the bag loose, so the frosting may be the result of years of rattling around in the bag, going from one bitterly disappointed owner to the next.

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The decals helpfully say 'Spitfire' in case you forget what this plastic shape is intended to represent. That's pretty much the only good thing I have to say about them. My mum used to say “If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all”. Although that would result in this being a very short review, mainly highlighting the fact they printed 'Spitfire' correctly.

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The instructions for the decorating labels have been translated into something approaching English by a mildly demented Danish parrot.

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The front of the instructions show Spit info in four languages – which seems wildly optimistic to me, together with a picture of an amorphous, novelty desk fan.

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The assembly instructions as you can see are a thing of wonder. Barely distinguishable from a Haynes manual. No doubt teams restoring real Spitfires could use it as an invaluable resource to check that it has a seat and wheels for example. Although it would be better if they didn't follow Starfix lead by putting the centre holes for the main wheels in the rough vicinity of the middle rather than that actual middle. Pedantic I know.

As usual the gorgeous artwork was drawn by the owners five year old, who had the shape described to him by some old bloke who saw one once in the distance seventy years ago. Helpfully it suggests painting the inside before the fuselage is glued together. Lean something every day, thanks Starfix for making me a better modeller. It would have been nice to for them to say what colours to use though.

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There is an external colour guide on the back of the box :

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That's all the help your getting on that score and yes, the picture is that dark on the box.

The best thing in the box is the plastic bag the decals are in. I suspect it may be an aftermarket item.

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Conclusion:

Highly recommended. It's the funniest thing I've ever bought for £4.99.

 

I'm itching to get started. Or is it that I've forgotten to give the dog her flea medication? :ermm:

 

 

Edited by Gorby
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Odd, in the video you linked they had the same registration and decals on their Spitfire mk.IX kit as their mk.21?!

Amazing given their rigorous design, manufacture and QC efforts that that somehow slipped by. Spitfire experten of the forum may be able to explain whether this serial was reused as https://allspitfirepilots.org/aircraft/EF610 has it as a Vc and it looks like the BY squadron code was never used by any Spit.  

Edited by Lost Cosmonauts
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48 minutes ago, Vaastav said:

Looking forward to seeing it built

That makes one of us anyway.

Thank mates for comments and 'likes'.

I started yesterday afternoon an it's an... interesting build so far. More updates when I can stop laughing.

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Well I learnt something today. I thought starfix had just like one or two kits and then slid back into the swamp, but no....

Mind you looking at that Frelon and Nord Atlas... :no:

Most exciting part of the kit was the plastic bag, i love it 😬

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17 minutes ago, Che Guava said:

Look, be fair. It's not ALL bad.

If you honestly believe that then I’ve got an A-4 Skyhawk and an Alphajet you might be interested in

Anyone fancy a Starfix manufacturer GB?

Edited by Lost Cosmonauts
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1 hour ago, Mad Steve said:

Well I learnt something today. I thought starfix had just like one or two kits and then slid back into the swamp, but no....

Starfix (based in Israel) have probably done rather well financially, whatever you think of their products. This is something that few modellers can get their head around, manufacturing plastic kits is a simple business where you make a product to sell and turn a profit, even if the product is dross. Starfix kits display marketing genius.

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Excellent review, I too am amazed to learn that Starfix had such a large catalog. The Huey looks.....hueyish and the decorating labels are pure genius, sure to catch on (are you listening Eduard?).

The inclusion of an interlude in your review was something I wish I’d thought of.

 I look forward to seeing the build progress.

Duncan B

p.s. Where do we send the bricks to for the final reveal?

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Sorry it's taken me a while to get this started, I know you're all desperate to see this wonder kit built. Good things come to those that wait. So you've obviously not waited long enough.

In some ways I feel sorry for for this kit. The poor thing has probably spent decades being rejected time after time, probably after having to spend years in stashes being picked on and ridiculed by the big kits. So I intend to make a reasonable job with this, I won't be going overboard but I won't be bricking it like Alistair:no:

A few years ago I considered buying a Starfix Spit and ploughing all my modelling skill into super detail it to make it as accurate as possible. I'm not that man any more. In fact I'm not sure I'd even be on speaking terms with that man. The likelihood is that I'd cross the road to avoid that man and get a restraining order so that man couldn't come within 500 yards of me. The kit will be built out of the box as building it in a lead-lined sealed box doesn't seem to be a viable option. I've checked.

Finally after wandering in the wilderness for forty years (or so) it has finally got it's time in the spotlight. I won't go though this kit step by step. I'm just not that cruel. I'll try to stick to the highlights lowlights.

At first I thought the thing the blue arrow is pointing to was just flash. In fact it's the amount the moulds were misaligned. Talking of misaligned, look at those holes. The hole is centred from the other side but when you remove the mould overlap all around the wheel, the hole won't be in the middle on either side.

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Oh oh… er.... I have something NICE to say about the kit :o, hang on I'm feeling slightly flustered. Need to calm down, calm down, wait for you head to stop spinning. Right, I'm a little more composed….. Now, wait for this… you might need to sit down – breath deeply, that's right....

If you're doing this a wheels up…. The main wheel doors fit with a minimum of alteration :o… it's certainly better than some Eduard kits I've done.

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Dog hairs don't come as standard.

I spoke too soon didn't I?

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The wheels don't fit in the holes at all. Even after removing the mould overlap they are still waaaaay to big. Fear not. I have a cunning plan. A plan so cunning that… oh.. that's someone else's joke isn't it?

I'm doing it wheels up so if I just cut one wheel in half they fit well in the wheel well – quite well. :ermm:

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The under-wing scoopy things are moulded in very, very thick plastic.

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In places the plastic is so thick it has strata – two layers of different colours, and the plastic is so hard it's like chipping away at rock. Due to the age of the kit I'm surprised I didn't find a fossil or two. You may ask “Why bother thinning it at all?”, why do any of us bother to do seemingly pointless things like this? Don't tell me that you've never done something equally as futile only to then sit back and wonder were life started to go so wrong. 

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Guess what these parts are supposed to be.

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WRONG!

I can confidently say that because if you said “Two 20mm Hispano cannons”, you bloody cheated! :fish:

I'm so pleased I went with the full resin cockpit interior. Adds so much don't you think? I particularly like the pilots throne. Who needs all that extra unnecessary stuff cluttering the place up. It still took me four days to close the fuselage, just think how long it took me to do the same on Zvezda's 1/48 Pe-2. The driver needed the childs booster seat option and I'm still not convinced he'll be able to see over the steering wheel. Seems a shame buttoning it up and hiding this for ever. And hidden it will be, as you're not going to be able to see anything though the canopy.

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The Tamiya Spit jockey tried it for size and didn't appear particularly impressed.

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Now you need to go back to your own kits and apologise profusely for any obscenity you've hurled at it, and remember,  there's always someone worse off than yourself.

 

Edited by Gorby
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I'VE FOUND A GOOD THING!!!! :smiling:

Fits like a glove*.

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*Admittedly a cheap, one size fits all type glove that you'd only really use for gardening.

Ah… not so good.

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(Look at that lovely fuselage detailing. Did they carve the mould freehand in a darkened cellar with a rusty penknife when their blood-sugar was low?)

The canopy fits well (ish – lets not get too carried away) on one side, but not very well on the other. I think I know what caused that. The fuselage does have some very helpful locating tabs. Unfortunately they locate the sides at different heights – a difference of about half a mil.

That's not the only thing skewed. One wing fits okay-ish and the other is about 1mm out.

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Oh god! At least no one will remember that I said I'm going to try and make a reasonable job of this. Damnit I've just reminded you haven't I. I love the way the wing rivets form a very pleasing 'V' shape now the wings are attached. Perhaps the 'designers' didn't think that anyone would get this far.

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More of that lovely freehand surface detail. I hate to be pedantic… aren't they sort of meant to meet in the middle?

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I made an effort I really did and there was a LOT more swarf than you see here. Incidentally, why is it that the messiest process is generally one day after you've done the hoovering? Is it a universal law of modelling? In the past I've covered my embarrassment by claiming to Mrs Gorby that it's dandruff, to which her reply is “You haven't got enough hair”. The effrontery of the woman!!! :dry:

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Either the dihedral is questionable or it's supposed to represent it mid flap?

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This view also shows that legendary graceful sinuous shape of the fuselage (is square sinuous?).

I found later that the tailplane is just as bad – but the other way, which accentuates the skewed effect.

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Just a tiny smidge of filler although No worse than anything that Richard encounters with pretty much all of his builds. If your having trouble seeing it, your Labrador will point it out to you. As there may people of a nervous disposition watching, I won't show underneath.

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There will now be a minutes silence in memory of the selfless sandpaper that died to get to this stage. Not only tackling the wave upon wave of filler without thought of it's own preservation, cutting down monstrous zombie rivets by the thousand and finally breathing its last at the battle of Fuselage Steppe. We salute you. Your sacrifice will be remembered for all eternity, or whenever I next go to Halfords to get more supplies – whichever comes sooner.

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The underside shows the unmistakable shape of a….. a…. a….. an aeroplane. A sight guaranteed to warm the heart of anyone who doesn't have this monstrosity sitting on their workbench.

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It does bring to mind the idea I've voiced in the past about having a handicap taken into consideration in group builds with WNW kits loosing you 10 points to start with and Starfix kits giving you plus 10. Sounds damn reasonable to me. Perhaps it's time implement this fantastic idea Darren.....

Darren?.....

Hello?

Why's it gone quite all of a sudden? ¬¬

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17 hours ago, Gorby said:

“You haven't got enough hair”

Plenty of scalp skin to flake though, the folically challenged can still (adding insult to injury) get dandruff 

Fine remedial work on the kit. Is there a special sainthood forum badge or status you’ll earn for this self flagellation? 

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5 minutes ago, Lost Cosmonauts said:

Is there a special sainthood forum badge or status you’ll earn for this self flagellation?

It almost feel ashamed to say that I'm quite enjoying building it. :blushing:

7 minutes ago, Lost Cosmonauts said:

Plenty of scalp skin to flake though, the folically challenged can still (adding insult to injury) get dandruff 

Yes, but the furniture polish tends to hold it in place.

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